Friday, November 03, 2006

U2 wins at Q magazine awards despite being boring nostalgia act

U2 are just a little bit overrated aren't they?

Despite mostly just being that band that wrote that "I still haven't found what I'm looking for" song that's played over the "protagonist loses job/girlfriend" scene in every second movie ever made u2 have done quite well for themselves: they're routinely labelled 'the best band eva' by rubbish music magazines, they've sold a zillion records and smug frontman Bono includes George W Bush, Tony Blair and the Pope as personal acquaintances.

And their inexplicable success continues: just last week they cleaned up at the Q awards which ignored the fact that U2 haven't released an album in almost two years in order to grant them the awkwardly titled "best of bands" award. Guitarist The Edge also won the "innovation in sound" award despite the fact that every U2 album has sounded the same since 1992.

Less reported on by the media was U2's triumphant blitz of the less well known but industry respected HELL FELL MUSIC AWARDS. Unsurprisingly, U2 took home the most overrated band of the millenium award and Bono snagged himself a least good self-righteous, ugly outdated sunglasses wearing do-gooding pop star award. However despite being nominated in the musician with the stupidest name category he disappointingly lost out to fellow bandmate The Edge. U2 also failed to snag the Pete Townshend just bloody give it up before you break a fucking hip you self congratulatory wankers award which instead went to senior citizens The Rolling Stones.

But it aint just me who thinks U2 have become a has been nostalgia act, the music industry appears to think so too. This can be seen in the fact that U2 have fallen into that rut popularized by other probably past their use by date acts as Bob Dylan, Neil Young and The Rolling Stones, namely every single time they release an album it's declared by Rolling Stone, NME and Q as their best since (insert their probably decades old last decent album here). If that's not a sign that U2 should stop making records and stick to selling concert t-shirts I don't know what is.

Of course, U2 appear to believe this themselves. Because it's been a whole eight minutes since they released their last greatest hits collection, U2 are releasing a brand new retrospective on the 21st of November embarrasingly titled U218.

In other embarrasing U2 news, it has been reported that their songs are starting to be used as hymns in episcopal churches across America, "Sunday Bloody Sunday" being a favourite with kids and teens forced to participate in their parents' tedious superstitions.

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

Anyone who calls himself "Bono Vox" ('beautiful voice' in Italian) deserves a short, sharp kick to the gonads, preferably followed by Chinese water torture until they agree never to offend my ears with their cheesy, psuedo-emotional pap EVER again.

I can't help but feel that any do-gooding on his part is less about the doing good than the desire to be important and get love from the world.

And did you see the documentary about the Live 8 single? Where he talked on and on about how he'd flown over from America especially so he could take part and redo his famous line (while everyone in the background looked as though it would have been quite nice if he hadn't bothered)? Why would someone be proud of singing "Tonight thank God it's them instead of you"? Wanker!

Anonymous said...

LOL! I never paid attention to that line of the song before, but now that you mention it, it is strikingly ego-centric isn't it? Perhaps I never noticed it because my attention was always distracted by this line:

"... And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas-time."

No snow, eh? I'm sure they'll all be really, really hacked off about that.
"Where's my feckin' snow!" I imagine they'll all be saying.
"What kind of a miserable feckin' excuse for a christmas-time is this, without a covering of feckin' snow on the vast desert plains of our African homeland? And will someone please tell me how the feck we're gonna hold our traditional African Xmas-time sledge-racing contest, if it doesn't hurry up and feckin' snow this year!"

Captain Great said...

Bono calls himself 'beautiful voice'? Wow. What a dickhead.

"And did you see the documentary about the Live 8 single?"

Nah I missed that one but I did read that Rolling Stone interview where he talked about himself in third person for several pages. Twat.

Captain Great said...

"... And there won't be snow in Africa this Christmas-time."

Grr...those fat beaurocrats and their refusal to end foreign debt or something. They're stopping it from snowing in Africa the bastards!

Anonymous said...

Yeah, 'bono vox' translates to beautiful voice. And he called himself Bono Vox.

T W A TTTTTTTTTTT!

It's so pleasing to find others who hate that turdfaced wanker as much as I do.

james said...

So there is a unity of dislike towards this arrogant prick. Anyone who thinks using their position in music going to save the world by talk with leaders of the universe is self centred. He markets himself to the ASDA's through government, I am pretty sure he can afford to eat organic and he could reduce his carbon footprint by exhaling less co2 by shutting up. Your band your band is bland ambition......$$$$$$$$$$