The O.C: Shit-canned!

Teenagers are just a little bit mediocre aren't they? A find a day rarely goes by when I don't wish all those whiney, fad following cry babies with assymetrical haircuts and rubbish tastes in music weren't just a tiny bit dead. Not completely dead - I'm not an asshole - just a little bit deceased.

Why we bother catering to this faction of society with crappy TV shows instead of locking them up in concentration camps, I really don't know. Well actually, it probably has something to do with human rights and The UN Convention for the Rights of a Child or some such nonsense; but clearly the people that coined these ideas have never been subjected to a My Chemical Romance CD or that episode of Saved By the Bell where Skreech dresses up like a girl and seduces Mr. Belding.

Anyway, the man, has struck a fatal blow to ironic Barbie backpack wearing, Arctic Monkeys listening, black fingernail toting adolescents everywhere with the recent announcement of the cancellation of naff American teen drama The O.C. Now you'll probably know The O.C. as the show that launched the career of Adam Brody and his own particular patented blend of stilted, awkwardly delivered dialogue and off comic timing. Or the career of Mischa Barton, the worst model turned actress since Denise Richards squirted out a bunch of sprogs and stopped getting given movie roles. Or the careers of Benjamin McKenzie and Rachel Bilson...but those guys are going to be completely forgotten after next month when the final episode of the show airs so I'm not going to waste space by saying anything about them.

However, if you choose not to watch adolescent melodramas because you're an intelligent, cultured adult here's a quick heads-up: essentially, The O.C is one of those nonsensical American explorations of adolescence that revolve around "jocks" and "cheerleaders" and "proms" and "Yale" and other made-up words. It features the light-hearted adventures of token nerd Adam Brody as he wackily tries to lose his virginity to best-friend, token bad-boy Benjamin McKenzie. Meanwhile, token popular hot girl Mischa Barton tries to win a bet by turning token ugly geek Rachel Bilson into a totally gear bird before Spring Break. Probably it also has some vampires in it too.

But alas, The O.C. is no more. Show creator Jason Schwartz released a statment saying "The O.C. Season Four finale will also be the series finale. This feels like the best time to bring the show to its close. Thanks to the hard work of our cast, crew and writers, we have enjoyed our best season yet, and what better time to go out than creatively on top." Translation: "Our ratings stunk so we got shitcanned! Adam Brody is now unemployed!"

Reportedly, a whole bunch of teenagers protested this cancellation by cutting their wrists a bit, going all "what-eva!" when their Maths teacher caught them smoking behind the bike sheds and writing a very special "OMG! My mum is suhc a bitch! LOLZ!" message on Myspace.